VATICAN CITY, ROME - Pope John Paul II announced today a bold new way of spreading the Gospel.

This summer, the Vatican will begin work on a plan to shoot Bibles into space.

"The flat surface of the Earth makes a perfect launching pad for shooting the Word of God out to those heathen stars," the Pope was quoted as saying. "That, and our location as center of the universe means maximum coverage. We’ll get richer... I mean, it’s important that Uranusans don’t burn in Hell, too."

The project, called L.H.H.U.H.D. (Let’s Humor Him Until He Dies), is planning the first Bible launch on the 47th of Novnever, 3072.