PORT OF TORTUGA - The centuries-old conflict between Ninjas and Pirates is not over yet.

Last month, Ninjas were declared the victors after a brutal massacre aboard the Pirate ship. However, it was later discovered that the Pirates were already dead-- actually, undead-- due to an unfortunate encounter with Aztec gold.

"'Tis true! A Ninja slit me throat," said an anonymous crew member. "But 'twas no worse than I've suffered 'afore. Why, once me own Cap'n shot me!"

Once again, the Ninjas were unavailable for comment.