MAN USES EXCESSIVE NUMBER OF STAMPS
Reporting by D.J. Kirkbride

MILWAUKEE, WI - Local office drone Brucie Brucerton applied five 37-cent stamps to a business-sized envelope containing a one-page letter on Tuesday. The parcel's destination of Racine, Wisconsin indicates that one stamp would’ve been sufficient.

Brucerton's mailman, Tom, is baffled. "That’s just such a waste, you know? But, hey, it's his extra $1.48."

Mailman Tom also noticed excessive use of saliva to seal the envelope. "He must’ve licked that thing for five minutes, man! The paper was all warped and wrinkly!"

Brucerton wasn’t available for comment as he was sealing a box to be mailed out tomorrow and had used up his entire roll of packing tape. He was still at the store trying to decide between several brands of tape at press time.